Tag: thought

“Think Again: Relief from the Burden of Introspection” by Jared Mellinger

~ Bob Hayton ~ 1 Comment

Think Again by Jared Mellinger“Did he or didn’t he? Did he step out of bounds or not?”  In the world of sports, such questions are settled with instant replay. The referees look at the video monitor and think again about the play they had just presided over. But now with additional camera angles, the verdict is overturned. “No, he was in bounds! Play on.”

In real life, however, relying on instant replay is not always a good idea. Some people go to the cameras over and over again, rehashing each scene and second-guessing each decision. Introspection like that can be a harmful practice. Yet who hasn’t taken joy in reliving a precious moment or grown through uncovering a destructive pattern?

Jared Mellinger addresses this thorny topic gracefully in a new book Think Again: Relief from the Burden of Introspection (New Growth Press, 2017). No stranger to negative thinking himself, Mellinger shares what he’s learned through his life and ministry and draws from a host of reliable and helpful sources to cover this subject from almost every angle.

I imagine if I were to find a book on this topic in a typical Christian bookstore, the concept of having positive self-esteem might surface. That or a simple 8 steps to conquer this problem for good. Mellinger doesn’t frame the matter so simply. He gives a big picture and a theological worldview through which to look at introspection, rather than a simple prescription for a happier life. And concerning self-esteem, he resists the urge to give in to the cultural pull to affirm yourself. A sample of some of his takeaways on this point will help:

Psalm 139:14 does not say, “I feel good about myself, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” It says, “I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” The focus is on God. The praise is directed to God, and the idol of self has been displaced. (p. 38)

Those with high self-image enjoy the praise they receive and think, I am awesome. Those with low self-image often want to receive praise they are not receiving and think, I am worthless. but through the idol-destroying power of the gospel, “I am awesome” and “I am worthless” give way to “Lord, I will praise you.” (p. 39)

As the above excerpt illustrates, the book is clear and easy to read. The illustrations are poignant and pertinent, and they get your attention: Dobby the house elf even makes an appearance. The author is well read on this topic and acquaints the reader with numerous resources, recommending some books and quoting from classic Christian authors: C.S. Lewis, Charles Spurgeon, D.M. Lloyd-Jones, Richard Sibbes, John Calvin, G.K. Chesterton, and many more.

The strategy put forth is not to avoid introspection altogether, but to think less of self and more of Christ. He does call for repentance when sinful motives are found, but he also warns against letting false guilt consume you. We are sinful and fallen, but he reminds us of how often Paul praised God for the evidences of God’s grace in the people he wrote to: we too must learn to see grace “in the mirror” (p. 97).

The book is not a theological treatise, don’t get me wrong. It is incredibly helpful and practical. Mellinger shares realistic scenarios and walks through likely reactions from introverts and others. He often draws from his own experience with introspection and how others helped him.

I can’t help but quote from his concluding chapter. This is really good:

The Christian life is a life of radical extra-spection. For every look to ourselves, we should be taking ten looks to Christ. And every time we look at ourselves, what we see should lead us back to Christ. Any sin we find should drive us to the work of Christ for us. And any good we find in ourselves should reveal the work of Christ in us and through us. Any weakness we find should lead us to the power of Christ toward us. (p. 155)

I can’t think of a better resource to give to those who struggle with doubts or the tendency to second-guess and over-analyze decisions and motives. This resource is filled with Gospel goodness and solid enough to help those in a variety of situations. It is a book one might want to give away to special people in your life who are tender but perhaps too often weighed down with care.

Book Blurbs:

“Astute, pastorally sensitive, and deeply searching” ~ Sinclair Ferguson, professor and author of numerous books including The Christian Life and Devoted to God

“I believe that for many people this will be a truly liberating book.” ~ Tim Chester, author of over 30 books including You Can Change

“Think Again will help you find freedom as you learn how to guard your heart while renewing your mind.” ~ Bob Lepine, Cohost of FamilyLife Today

See more reviews at litfuse.com.

Where to Buy:

Disclaimer:

This book was provided by the publisher. I was under no obligation to offer a favorable review.

Lost in a Good Footnote: How to Have Joy When You Are Hurting

~ Bob Hayton ~ 1 Comment

Have you ever read something in a footnote that was just too good to leave there? If you are like me, you can get “lost in a good footnote.” This post focuses on another great footnote.

I think that this gem buried in Joe Rigney’s book The Things of Earth: Treasuring God by Enjoying His Gifts (Crossway, 2015) is worth sharing.

Before you get to the quote, let me set the stage. Have you ever been hurting? Just completely consumed by grief or sorrow? If you remain in such a condition for long, you feel that there is no more joy in the world. The sun doesn’t seem fair, the flowers are dull, everything is meaningless. So what can you do to get yourself out of such a perilous state? This footnote has an answer.

At first it doesn’t sound like good news, but the Bible tells us that we must “rejoice with those who rejoice.” And perhaps that is the key. You have lost something, but they have not. You are hurting, but their hurt is of a lesser degree. Would you rob them of shared joy, by extending your grief to cover them too?

An others-focus may just free us from a pattern of self-despair. Looking away from ourselves, doesn’t mean we cease to grieve or hurt. But it does mean we see God at work in bigger and broader ways, with more people than just our immediate family.

This goes both ways, because we are called to “weep with those who weep.” So even our highest joys should be tinged with an awareness of the hurting of others. This is the sort of tangible togetherness and unity that should be the hallmark of Christian love and of the Church that Jesus founded.

Let me share the quote which set my mind to this direction. And please note that ultimately it is only the Holy Spirit and His work in us which enables such a radical others-orientation. May God bless all who ponder the Scripture behind the thoughts shared below.

In an earlier chapter, I spoke of the way that the Bible expands our minds by pulling us in opposite directions and that we must embrace the mystery and refuse to allow one truth to cancel out another. This is no less true of our emotional lives. One of the seemingly impossible commands in the Bible is found in Rom. 12:15: “Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.” The gospel lays both of these commands upon us. Those who suffer are called to add their joy to the joy of the blessed. Those who receive favor must join the grieving in the midst of their sorrow. And we must do so without allowing one emotion to tyrannize the other. The glad-hearted must not lord their blessings over the afflicted. The hurting must not allow their pain to drown out real joy when it’s given from God. Love must be genuine (Rom. 12:9), and we must endeavor to live in harmony with one another (Rom. 12:16). Practically speaking, this means that our lives will be characterized by the same heart as the apostle Paul, who lived “as sorrowful, yet always rejoicing” (2 Cor. 6:10). It also means that wisdom and propriety will govern our joy and sorrow, so that we move with the rhythms of Eccles. 3:4: “[There is] a time to weep, and a time to laugh.” And the only way that we’ll make any progress in getting these rhythms right is if we are open and honest in communicating with one another and if we are trusting in the grace of God to be sufficient for our every need. It is grace that enables the sorrowful to rejoice in the joy of others, especially when they receive something that we desperately want or have tragically lost. It is grace that enables the joyful to bear with the suffering of the grief-stricken, especially when our hearts are bursting with gladness. Grace must reign, love must cover a multitude of sins, wounds, and thoughtlessness, and Christ must do what is impossible for us.

— Endnote 13 from chapter 11, found on pg. 259.

Pick up a copy of this book at Amazon, or Westminster books.

Tim Keller on a Gospel View of Work

~ Bob Hayton

Every Good Endeavor: Connecting Your Work to God's Work by Tim KellerLiving out the Christian life on Monday morning is just about the hardest thing there is to do. Everything can seem so great on Sunday. The worship music is great, the time spent in the Bible so precious, and the pastor’s message equal parts (hopefully) convicting and inspiring. But when the alarm goes off on Monday morning, many of us have a problem bringing Sunday with us throughout the week.

Tim Keller’s new book Every Good Endeavor: Connecting Your Work to God’s Work (Dutton, 2012), goes a long way toward helping out those of us who find ourselves immersed in the work-a-day world. I can’t launch off into a full review of this excellent work at the moment, but I wanted to excerpt some of Keller’s thoughts on how a gospel worldview can help us look at our work in a different way.

To be a Christian in business, then, means much more than just being honest or not sleeping with your coworkers. It even means more than personal evangelism or holding a Bible study at the office. Rather, it means thinking out the implications of the gospel worldview and God’s purposes for your whole work life — and for the whole of the organization under your influence. (168-169)

So when we say that Christians work from a gospel worldview, it does not mean that they are constantly speaking about Christian teaching in their work. Some people think of the gospel as something we are principally to “look at” in our work. This would mean that Christian musicians should play Christian music, Christian writers should write stories about conversion, and Christian businessmen and -women should work for companies that make Christian-themed products and services for Christian customers. Yes, some Christians in those fields would sometimes do well to do those things, but it is a mistake to think that the Christian worldview is operating only when we are doing such overtly Christian activities. Instead, think of the gospel as a set of glasses through which you “look” at everything else in the world. Christian artists, when they do this faithfully, will not be completely beholden either to profit or to naked self-expression; and they will tell the widest variety of stories. Christians in business will see profit as only one of several bottom lines; and they will work passionately for any kind of enterprise that serves the common good. The Christian writer can constantly be showing the destructiveness of making something besides God into the central thing, even without mentioning God directly. (179-180)

Of all the ways the Christian faith affects work, the realm of the worldview is the most searching and yet also the hardest to put into practice. All Christians live in cultures and work in vocational fields that operate by powerful master narratives that are sharply different from the gospel’s account of things. But these narratives work at such a deep level that their effects on us are hard to discern. An American who first moves to a foreign country is shocked to discover how many of her institutions and practices that she considered common sense and universal are actually particularly American ones — and are ridiculous to many other people. By living in another culture she gets a new vantage point from which she can be critical of herself, and as a result she will slowly change, dropping some attitudes and adopting others.

Becoming a Christian is a lot like moving to a new country; only it is more profound, because it gives us a new perspective on every culture, every worldview, and every field of work. In the long run, the gospel helps us see everything in a new light, but it takes time to grasp and incorporate this new information into how we live and pursue our vocations. And we can be sure that this ultimate learning experience will never truly end; we are told the angels themselves never tire of looking into the gospel to see new wonders (1 Peter 1:10-12). (181-182)

You can pick up a copy of this book at any of the following online retailers: Westminster Bookstore, Christianbook.com, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or direct from Dutton (Penguin).

Book Briefs: “Heart of the Matter: Daily Reflections for Changing Hearts and Lives” edited by Nancy B. Winter

~ Bob Hayton ~ 1 Comment

The Christian Counseling and Education Foundation (CCEF) is a ministry focused on providing biblical counseling materials to the church. Their materials connect the Gospel to all of life and are designed to equip local churches to minister to all of the needs of their congregations. I have previously reviewed some of their books (here and here), and helped teach one of their courses (How People Change). I am constantly impressed by the quality of their work and how practical it is for the real problems people face.

New Growth Press has compiled a collection of excerpts from books written by such CCEF authors as Timothy S. Lane, Paul David Tripp, David Powlison, Edward T. Welch, Michael R. Emlet, William P. Smith, and more. The result is a year-long devotional, Heart of the Matter: Daily Reflections for Changing Hearts and Lives, edited by Nancy B. Winter. This hardcover book includes daily devotional readings for every day of the year. The selections are short and readable, yet thoughtful and weighty. The readings are meant to complement a Scripture text to be read each day.

These devotional nuggets provide a practical out-working of a Gospel-centered perspective on all of life that under-girds the counseling approach of CCEF. The sovereignty of God, the reality of the kingdom, the cross of Christ, and grace-based sanctification are a few of the themes explored in these pages. Included in the back of the book is a listing of the source of each excerpt. Particularly poignant daily readings can be traced back to the book they were excerpted from, allowing the reader to turn to the source for more from the author on that subject. Also helpful is a lengthy index of Scripture passages commented on in the book. This index could be used as a guide for reading through the Bible. As you read passages, you can turn to the index and see if any devotional thoughts are available that intersect with the verses you just read.

Perhaps the best way to demonstrate the high quality of this particular devotional is to encourage you to take a quick read through some sample pages (Introduction and Jan. 1-5) provided by the publisher.

If you’re looking for a new devotional for 2012, look no further than this volume from CCEF. I’m confident its Gospel-centered, practical application of Scripture to all of life will make a lasting impression on your heart. It can help facilitate real change, by the power of the Holy Spirit–and that is what CCEF is all about.

Pick up a copy of this book at any of the following online retailers: Westminster Bookstore, Christianbook.com, Amazon, or direct from New Growth Press.

Disclaimer: This book was provided by New Growth Press. I was under no obligation to offer a favorable review.

About Book Briefs: Book Briefs are book notes, or short-form book reviews. They are my informed evaluation of a book, but stop short of being a full-length book review.

Giving in to “Weaker Brothers”

~ Bob Hayton ~ 8 Comments

I came across an interesting post that raises a good question. Is it really okay to modify your actions based on the weaker consciences of some?

Here’s the post:

In 1857 a few white members of the Dutch Reformed Church in South Africa asked permission to celebrate the Lord’s Supper separately from their black brothers and sisters. The General Assembly believed their request was wrong, but it acquiesced “due to the weakness of some.” This concession soon became the norm, as white Christians increasingly chose to observe the Lord’s Supper without their black siblings. Their racism prompted the unwanted black Christians to leave and start their own churches. And so the South African church, divided by race, eventually became a vocal supporter of apartheid. In 1924 the DRC argued that the races must remain separate, for “competition between black and white on economic levels…leads to poverty, friction, misunderstanding, suspicion, and bitterness.”

How might the history of South Africa be different if the church had not conceded to the sinful request of a few “weaker brothers”? We are thankful for leaders such as Nelson Mandela who gave their lives to end apartheid. But it’s a shame on the church that their sacrifice was even needed.

Peter gave in to the “weaker brothers” in Antioch. He knew they were wrong to insist that Gentiles live like Jews, but afraid of what they might say, he refused to eat with Gentiles when these Judaizers came to town. Paul recognized this was a big deal, for the reason these Jews split from the Gentiles put the gospel at risk. How would the history of Christianity be different if Paul had not stood up to Peter’s shameful concession?

It’s never right to do wrong because others think it’s right. We must not violate our conscience on the flimsy ground that “They wouldn’t understand,” “It’s what they expect,” or “Just this once, what will it hurt?” It may seem easier to give in, but our concession will make life harder down the road.

–Read the original post from Mike Wittmer

I think you can definitely get in trouble if you’re always giving in to “weaker brothers”. It’s one thing to aim not to offend, it’s quite another to live your life with the weaker brother always potentially popping up at every turn.

What do you think? Is Mike Witmer way off base here? Am I?