Responding to Gay Marriage

Everyone is sharing their thoughts on the Supreme Court’s recent decision to establish marriage as a right to any two people (regardless of gender). And from the intensity and number of both positive and negative reactions, this certainly does feel like a momentous step in our nation’s history. I wanted to bring together some rambling thoughts I’ve had on this issue and point to some resources that may prove helpful.

1) This is not a simple question.

Should we be against “gay marriage” in the civil arena? In light of developments and where we are now at, many Christians would say “of course!” But it isn’t as easy as that.

On this question I have been moved (in a humane way) by the desire of two people for mutual connection and a permanent relationship, and especially about their need for legal status when it comes to end of life scenarios and other important concerns. Some thought “civil unions” was a way to permit this and yet hold marriage for one man and woman, as it has always been. But that solution no longer is viable, it would seem. For more on this line of thinking (the plight of those who experience same-sex attraction) I strongly recommend Wesley Hill’s book Washed and Waiting: Reflections on Christian Faithfulness and Homosexuality (read my review here).

I have also been keenly aware of just how clear Scripture is on the nature of true marriage and the intent of marriage – to be a picture of Christ and the church. Redefining marriage doesn’t change its nature, it just lessens the idea and makes it more of a bland, pliable entity. Joe Carter explores that angle well in an article for Tabletalk called “Defining Marriage.”

A third consideration has been the futility of legislating morality. I can hold onto a biblical definition of marriage but allow others to have their own opinion – why do we have to force others to live up to Christian values? Additionally, should the church really be focusing so much on political questions? John Piper didn’t think so, and I agreed. Furthermore, focusing clearly on the marriage issue can tend to obscure the Gospel and imply that Christianity is just about morality. This is why I was leery of the Manhattan Declaration. Yet, morality and law do go together, some laws clearly are moral concerns. And encouraging a good society – protecting children and the rights of biological parents, these factors all make this particular issue (gay marriage) one that may very well be worth fighting, just from a pragmatic standpoint.

2) What about America?

Many Christians love America, and to a certain extent I do too. So how should we feel about our nation’s embrace of gay marriage?

Well, I agree with John Piper that we should weep over the “institutionalizing” of sin that it represents. And we should not be afraid of standing up for truth and owning the offense of the Cross.

But in another sense, America has always been a pagan nation. We can certainly pray for God to bless our country, but the direction she is going puts the lie to the commonly held assumption that America somehow deserves God’s blessing. Christians are citizens of a heavenly country, and God used this sociopolitical nation to advance his Church, just as he used other nations in other times. God is doing big things in other places, and we don’t have a corner on Him.

3) How is the Church to respond?

If you don’t click on any link in this post other than this one, that would be fine. Russell Moore’s article in the Washington Post is incredibly helpful with regard to this question: “Why the Church should neither cave nor panic about the decision on gay marriage.” Read that and be encouraged.

As for strategy when it comes to pastors and how they go about marrying heterosexual couples only and avoid legal troubles, I actually think Roger Olson’s proposal is worth considering. Be sure to read his follow up post too.

And of course, we should continue to resist the pressure to reinterpret the Scripture. Kevin DeYoung has given us a very helpful book that clearly explains the arguments being made that try to say the Bible doesn’t forbid homosexual practice. His book addresses the chief arguments and opens up the Scripture in a clear and forthright manner – and is careful to be charitable and loving in its tone. The book is from Crossway and is titled simply What Does the Bible Teach About Homosexuality?

Finally, we should not be surprised if we are misunderstood and hated. Jesus promised this: “If the world hates you, know that it has hated me before it hated you. 19 If you were of the world, the world would love you as its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you.” (John 15:18-19). Persecution is promised: “Through many tribulations we must enter the kingdom of God” (Acts 14:22). A martyr complex will do us no good.

In conclusion, let me just share a link to a post I wrote on the occasion of gay marriage being legal in Minnesota. My comments there apply to today as well: “Marriage, Meaning and Minnesota: How to React to the News that Gay Marriage is Now Legal.”

10 thoughts on “Responding to Gay Marriage

  1. 1. Yes, we should be involved in the politics and community of our time. When Christ admonished that we are to be “the salt of the earth,” I find all the biblical basis I need. If entanglements turn to ungodly allegiances, we should withdraw ourselves. We are to let our light SO shine that men (the unregenerate) may see your good works (yes, Jesus really did say that) and glorify your Father in heaven. Obviously, the only “good works” Jesus had in mind were those that point the lost to the Father. Such “good works” are not for us to find favor with God. They are so that others may find favor. It’s about soul-winning.

    2. I can appreciate the desire for love and companionship. But I must appreciate God’s view on the subject more than my own. What would Jesus say? What He has already said. Leviticus 20:13 tells me what Jesus has already said. It is an abomination for a man to lay with a man or a woman with a woman. It is an abomination worthy of death. Why? Because God knows with our foolish puppy dog mentality, we will come to accept homosexuality if it is not seen and dealt with as Jesus said. There are not two Gods, one of the Old Testament and one of the New. God has not changed His mind, even though 5 unelected jurists have changed our minds for us as a nation.

    3. God judges nations, not just individuals. None of this caught our Lord off guard, He is not surprised by these events. He is not surprised for the reason that He dreaded this day. His precious word warned us repeatedly never to go here. He has urged His people to pray for deliverance from evil. But we were not delivered. Don’t run to the sovereignty of God to explain that. This was never God’s plan or purpose for our nation. Judgment falls precisely because we disobey and resist God’s revealed plan and purpose. That purpose is found in the warnings of scripture. We were not delivered for the reason that God’s church was not found faithful in asking, praying, seeking God’s face, turning from our wicked ways. God says 2 Chronicles 7:14 is addressed to “My people.”

    4. The battle is joined. But you should know your enemy. Put on the whole armor of God. You will need every piece for the days ahead, now more than ever. You have an adversary. That adversary is doing all he can to oppose the sovereign plan of God. Your adversary is the devil who walks about seeking whom he may devour. Be sober-minded. Be vigilant, ever aware that satan desires your destruction. But we need not fear the outcome. Greater is he within you than he who is within the world.. But you should not think you are immune to the fiery darts, or that your physical life will be preserved. God’s people die in the battle. Are you ready for that kind of fight.

    5. Love the sinner. Point them to Jesus. Stop arguing whether gays are born that way. Of course they are. They are born that way just as others are born liars, born thieves, born intolerant, born prideful, born narcissistic, born rebellious. Their sin nature simply manifests differently than yours. But Jesus offers forgiveness and transformation. If any man be in Christ, he is a new creature. Old things are passed away. All things are become new. 2 Corinthians 5:17. Hallelujah. We can be changed. Let that be our gospel. But for God’s sake and your own, don’t sound an uncertain sound.

    1. 1 – agree to an extent. Being salt and light is more than just soul-winning, not to diminish that calling however. We image God in the world and draw people to Him. Political involvement must be careful to maintain the most important calling of the church in view. Absolutely.

      2 – God has changed his mind about our obligation to enact the death penalty. That is a civil calling and the Church is not a civil entity. So Jesus doesn’t stone the woman in adultery, and neither would he stone a homosexual. That being said, homosexual practice is forbidden and that has not changed, Rom. 1 is clear (among other passages). The church has made a big deal about homosexual practice being chosen, and performed by sick, depraved individuals who glory in sin. The church has often resisted any call that homosexuality may be natural or that people are “born that way.” I don’t agree with those sentiments and think we can work to appreciate the plight of homosexuals and their conflictions more. Having a compassionate view may allow us to better speak to them and minister to them. It appears that in many cases biology and upbringing together in some mysterious way make this orientation an un-asked for, reality in their lives. In a sense they were born that way. But I was born to sin in other ways as well. I’m thankful that many are rethinking their resistance to the “born that way” argument. Being compassionate and understanding doesn’t mean we tolerate sinful practice. Again read Wesley Hill for a careful, Christian response.

      3 – see my reply to the other comment above

      4 – Amen.

      5 – Agree

      1. You are wrong about God changing His mind. He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. You are right, if you mean to say that God’s directive was to the nation of Israel as they were being led into the promised land. All of scripture is for us, but all of scripture is not written to us. The lesson for our time is that God views homosexuality as “worthy of death.” I am not advocating for the death penalty. I am advocating that we tell our gay friends the truth about how God sees their sin. Then tell them to flee the wrath to come. Tell them He will abundantly pardon.

  2. I disagree with your statement in the article, “America has always been a Pagan nation.” America in it’s infancy, was a country in which the majority of its citizens either practiced Christianity, or at least accepted it as the religion of the land. There were no Buddhists or Muslims, and if there were a few atheists, they kept it to themselves.

    1. Amen to the last comment. Read “The Harbinger” by Rabbi Jonathan Cahn and then come tell me we have not been blessed (now cursed) of God.

      1. Rabbi Cahn seems to be a TBN personality and I don’t trust him. A cow with a number seven on its head is a special message to America? Really? God works like that? Where is the Scriptural justification that God now views America as a “chosen nation?”

    2. My position is that every nation on earth is a “pagan” nation, except Israel in the Old Testament when they had a theocracy.

      God does judge nations as collections of individuals, and I do not dispute there was a high number of “righteous” individuals involved in the founding of our country. But there were certainly other motives and the presence of sin, rebellion from England and other factors.

      America was never a “chosen people” – the Church has that designation. God works and walks among the churches in this age. He doesn’t give certain nations a favored status. At any time in our nation’s history, Christians were still to live as exiles and sojourners on this earth, with their true citizenship in heaven. We don’t have to defend our nation’s choices but we can certainly work to improve her – especially due to the blessing we have that our government is a democracy. That does involve obligations and responsibility, of course. But the idea that America has left her godly heritage and now is getting its just reward, assumes that God cares more for America than other nations in the first place. God cares for the church, and we should beware of fixating too much on any one nation as a new “promised land” where we can assume God must bless us.

      1. Acts 2:17-19. Signs and wonders precede the last days. So yes, that’s how God works. I’m not saying the cows are a sign, but God does indeed work in such ways.

      2. Psalm 33:12
        “Blessed is the nation who’s God is The Lord.”

        Come on Bob.

  3. As American’s Christian’s ought to appreciate the fact that we have a secular government and Constitution. You may believe that your scripture gives you access to God’s laws, but our constitution actually prohibits us from making your God’s law the law of the land.

    The problem with God’s “Law” is always: “Who’s God?”. The reason we’ve precious little religious violence in this country for over 200 years is belief in a separate church and state.

    The fact that Christian’s have a religion does not grant them moral expertise, it simply a religion. You may be religious, you may believe in your scripture, but that doesn’t make you moral authorities. You’re religious concern regarding scriptures pertains to the soul’s disposition upon death of the body, as such it can have little or nothing to with day to day morality. Gay people may be destined for Hell in the afterlife, but that doesn’t mean we can oppress them as matter of law here and now in America, nor does it mean it’s “immoral” for gay people to pursue happiness.

    The notion that God actually “blesses” entire nations like ours is simply theologically incoherent. I can’t even imagine what that would actually mean. Manifest Destiny was/is a perverse justification for colonial conquest, not an actual contract with God. Throughout history nations and governments have claimed to be moving with God’s blessings, this has never been more that a convenient public relations ploy. Given all the evil committed by and withing the United States: i.e. Slavery, lynching, mass murder, wars of choice for duplicitous reasons, poverty, etc. it’s hard to imagine that were it for that one thing, i.e. Gay Marriage, God would grant his/her full blessings upon the entire nation. The notion of God “blessing” nations so diminishes the whole concept of God it always surprises me when religious people make such claims… it’s kind of like claiming that God wanted one team or another to win a game kind.

    Finally, you can interpret your scripture as you see fit but it’s pure hubris to think you actually speak for God. Believing in God does not make you God. When you follow your scripture you are making a leap of faith, not establishing an enforceable contract with God. You will not really know your disposition in the afterlife until you stand before God for judgement, and if you think you can sway that judgement by arguing scripture you may be in for a surprise. The point is, you may choose not to reinterpret your scripture, but you don’t speak for all Christians, other’s will do so, that why there are and will be so many different types of Christian Churches and denominations.

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